Thursday, August 8, 2013

The Never Ending Battle with Mommy Guilt

If you are a Mom you have undoubtedly struggled with your fair share of "Mommy Guilt." I sense it daily, whether I've spent too much time looking at my phone, forgot to provide 5 different colors of food at dinner, struggled with our decision for me to stay at home, or decided that bath time could wait one more day because I'm tired and getting soaked while attempting to wash her hair just doesn't sound like my ideal for the night.

That's just a small taste of the little things that add up every day. The sneak up on you and smack you in the face with the harsh reality that you aren't good enough. You aren't perfect.

And don't forget how we are constantly comparing ourselves to other Moms. Moms who brush their hair every day. Moms who work and take care of their house and seem to do and have it all. Moms who feed their children a balanced, organic, diet of food from their meticulously maintained garden. Moms who bake their own bread, make everything from scratch, and manage a household full of children. Moms who have organized play dates and lesson plans from the time their child is an infant. 

Can I tell you a secret? You aren't that Mom. And guess what? That is ok. Do me a favor, take a deep breath, relax, and realize that you will never be perfect. 

There is freedom in imperfection. Freedom in knowing hard as we might try, we will never be the idealistic Super Mom we have built up. It's unattainable. Thank God for that.

What if we were perfect? What would our children learn? Would they learn how to set unreasonably high expectations for themselves? Would they beat themselves up each and every time they didn't meet those expectations? What about grace? Mercy? Forgiveness? There would be no room for mistakes, no room for failure. No room to grow and mature. No room for sanctification, for the refining fire that God uses to mold and shape the clay of our hearts when we are broken and vulnerable.

Don't aspire to be perfect. Aspire to be malleable and tender in the Potter's hand. That you would allow God to use your mistakes and your shortcomings to mold you into the Mom HE wants you to be. To allow God's tender grace and mercy to smooth the wrinkles and dimples of an imperfect person. That God would put you through the refining fire and you would come out just as He had planned, scars and all.

Jeremiah 18:1-6: The word that came to Jeremiah from the Lord: “Arise, and go down to the potter's house, and there I will let you hear my words.” So I went down to the potter's house, and there he was working at his wheel. And the vessel he was making of clay was spoiled in the potter's hand, and he reworked it into another vessel, as it seemed good to the potter to do.
Then the word of the Lord came to me: “O house of Israel, can I not do with you as this potter has done? declares the LordBehold, like the clay in the potter's hand, so are you in my hand, O house of Israel.

Zechariah 13:9: And tI will put this third into the fire, and refine them as one refines silver, and test them as gold is tested. They will call upon my name, and vI will answer them. I will say, ‘They are my people’;and they will say, ‘The Lord is my God.’”

2 Corinthians 12:9: But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Ok Moms, with grace as your shield and the truth as your sword, go forth and conquer yet another day. Another day that you get to teach your child that even Mommy is imperfect and needs Jesus to save her, to forgive her, to love and care for her. 

No comments: